Trees and Other Endangered Species

So, we’re completely destroying any and all trees within a 2000000 mile vicinity of humanity. And we think it’s just great.

We’ve already almost completely depleted our sources of teak, mahogany, and yellow balau. So we’re just finding new, more unreached places that haven’t been exploited yet, as soon as it becomes too rare and expensive anywhere. Good idea, right?

I don’t know. I think it’s a bit much when you get to the point of exploiting and driving TREES to extinction. How absolutely pathetic.

All you lovely loggers out there: Get off your butt, and go PLANT a tree. Then, sit, watch, and nurture said tree until it is at an age where you can kill it. Or even better, wait till it’s big enough for you to make a table out of just one horizontal slice. Record observations…like HOW FREAKING LONG IT TOOK. Like, oh, I don’t know, maybe a couple decades.

Now tell me that logging is sustainable.

Honestly, if you can find space that is not already being utilized (including by nature!) and find some magic way to fast grow these trees that you love so much for your furniture, toothpicks, and other decorations, then by all means, go right ahead. Plantation grow these trees (I already know it’s barely possible) and make your money that way. Don’t exploit nature’s creation and drive others out of their homes in the name of money!

Oh yeah…you’re humans. Just kidding, that’s not possible. That’s all that matters, after all. How much bloody green PAPER (made of trees, you guys…) you can make in your life time is not, a repeat not a measure of your value as a person.

Look, brah. If you really want all this furniture/toothpicks…

Yeah, I don’t know. Just go plant a bloody tree.

The Yellowstone River is...Black?

Ya know, lately I've been hearing a lot of complaining about negative people. So this morning I decided to try to make this next post positive.

'Try' being the key word. I didn't get that far. But then again, this blog wouldn't be what it is without my constant ragging cynicism.

So I picked up this story. I'm sure a lot of you have heard about that lovely ExxonMobil spill into the Yellowstone river in Montana.

Feels like a cheap attempt at replicating the BP spill into the gulf last summer. I mean, no one can deny the investment appeal of a giant corporation trying valiantly to cover their butts and pretend to care about the environment, meanwhile laundering money pointlessly and leaving it to independent organizations and charities to do all the work. Right?

Right. The quarterly and annual profits actually went up after the spill. We're so environmentally friendly, we give them more money after we realize just how wholly incompetent they are. And we don't even make them pay half of what they owe for their stupid, stupid stunt. Not even half. I assure you they have the kind of dough to pay it off easily. About a year after the oil spill, though, we hear nothing of what is still happening under the water at this very moment.

BP aside, Exxon is probably cashing in as we speak. Why, the governor of Montana even accused them of lying about statistics. All the better! Think of the kind of media exposure this gives them? For free?

What to me is the most amazing thing about this spill, however, it how Mr. Governor is handling it. Apparently, this guy actually studied soils and ag., so he knows what he's talking about. A first! And he's even going as far as to say that the data he receives and what he really sees don't match up. He's not trying to cover it up - he went on CNN and said plain enough that either they're really incompetent (unlikely for such an enormous corporation), or what they're telling us is straight up BS.

But who in the media doesn't enjoy some good ol' BS? That's what it's all about, after all.

Highways, Highways, Highwaaaays!

World leaders may not agree on matters of diplomacy and fair governance, but they can agree on one thing. The world needs more highways! Whether it's Crazy Castro or Slippery Singh, they've all come to the same consensus. If you have nothing, this is aimed at you, for your benefit. We're gonna build highways through some of the world's most iconic places!

For what, you might ask? Money, of course. AKA development, for those of you still working out what the politically correct are really saying. 

You may not have plumbing, or a clean place to sleep. But rest assured, at this very moment your government is working on getting you your very own handphone. You might even get a car if you're lucky. 

A place to live is not included in this one-time only deal.

Sign up now! All that it will cost is just some old nature reserves that no one cares about anyways.

...Alright. Cheesy advertisement aside, I'm not kidding. We all know our governments are just the bee's knees, but really. 

Tanzania is currently in the process of trying to build a major highways through the Serengeti. Smart economic move, right? Wrong. About 30% of the Tanzanian economy is generated from tourism directly related to the Serengeti. Just to 'connect' the other side of the country, to which there is a road just a wee bit south of there. Go to http://www.savetheserengeti.org/ for more info. Note that I am encouraging you to do it outta good will, not because I'm just advertising and such. 

Next. Cuba. Not much to know about this one internet wise, because of the whole communist though-shalt-not-pass thing. So I mean there's very little to know. Just the usual, mining and oil-drilling companies are trying to sink their teeth into Cuban resources, conveniently placed right near one of the last strongholds for Cuban Crocodiles. And naturally, we need a four-lane highway to make that crap easier for them poor corporations. 

What might seem more relevant to this blog is the Indian catastrophe. Among other ludicrous plans for the country, they've decided that a 4-lane highway bordering one of the best know NP's was in order. They plan to change this muddy lane that is commonly accessed by some of the 30 tigers that are part of Corbett National Park into a lively industrial highway. Because their consumerism-based economy will start going back downhill if they don't keep the cash flowing. http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=200250880021416&set=p.200250880021416&type=1&ref=nf As the caption finishes, "We need no external enemies. India has effective plans to destroy itself."